2016 Aug 3
Some alcohol and drinking related words you need to know.
So it’s agreed that we would go all out on the happy hour, that’s why places like the Kingsbury offers 2 hours, one at sunset and one in the middle of the night. We can’t blame it, some alcohol to take away the stress and hustle of the week is absolutely necessary.
But one thing we aren’t very familiar or comfortable with, are words related to alcohol or drinking. Sure, you can depend on your buddy to order you drink every time you’re at a bar, but knowing your own vocabulary is crucial. You wouldn’t want a waiter asking you if you want to have your shot neat, and expect it to come with some coke or so. The last thing you would want is the bartender making you feel silly. Honey, society does that around the clock, we don’t want that done in a bar too. Before I get into teaching you vocabulary, I’m going to let you on some golden rules of drinking.
Rule No.1 – Be the master of your own drink
Even if you are the boss of nothing else, when it comes to your alcohol, you’re King! Choose a few favourites with intention. Adopt a house brand of beer- or two, pick a house red and a house white and have a few choices of cocktails that you would opt for. You shouldn’t be shy about what you like. Always, pour your own damn drink if you’re at a party. Unless it’s a bartender or someone experienced, you don’t want to be poured too much alcohol in one shot.
Rule No.2 – Drink only enough
So getting drunk to the point where you would pass out is usually not a very happy experience. It’s usually one that makes you swear you would never drink again (but we all know you go back at it in about a week). Being a little tipsy or in your happy place makes the experience worthwhile. But the minute you’re too drunk to take care of yourself, you’re a burden to yourself and to those around you. Now somebody has to take care of you, sober you up before you go home because you would stand the risk of divorce because your wife said she wouldn’t take it anymore, etc.
Rule No.3 – If she’s had too much, let her go
I know for a fact that some men use alcohol as a women weakener. Give her a few glasses, get her all blurry and in exchange, you try to use her for more than the sweet talk and the charm. I’m not saying all men are this kind. There’s one half that’ll drop you home and there’s the other that won’t.
Rule No.4 – Never measure masculinity in a shot glass
We’ve confused drinking with boldness and authentic maleness. You can’t prove anything by shot gunning a six pack. Your tolerance levels may be high, but this is no direct indication of your masculinity. Vodka is not a whetstone to sharpen your sword.
Alright, not you know some golden rules of drinking. Feel free to comment below and let us know what your drinking rules are. Now here’s the educational part. Let’s look at some alcohol related words you need to know.
Rule No 5. – Do not drink and drive
As cliché this rule may be, the importance of this rule stands tall. You wouldn’t want to risk our life or one of an innocent strangers because one night, you decided to have too much fun. Just because you made it home safely to your bed does not mean that you’re making a right decision. When putting those keys in the ignition and driving away after drinking you are not only putting your life at risk but you are risking the lives of all those you come across while driving. First thing anyone can do is make the choice themselves not to drink and drive. Maybe get a friend to drop you home, or uber or tuk it.
- Apéritif– A small alcohol-based drink that is supposed to be consumed before a meal because of its appetite-stimulating properties. Basically, when you want a drink that will keep you hungry for the meal you’ll be ordering soon after, you order one from this selection.
Examples of such drinks: Vermouth, Campari, Cynar, Dubonnet; Champagne, Sherry, Prosecco and Cava work just as well.
- Digestif– This is an alcoholic drink that can be consumed, either before, or after a meal; but, is meant to aid in your digestion of whatever food you will be, or have already eaten. Although, preferably, consume after the meal, since you’re going for an aperitif prior to it.
Examples of such drinks: Brandy—Cognac, Armagnac, Port wines, Sherry, Whisky, Black Tequila, Jagermeister
- Neat – When you order a neat, you’re basically ordering an alcohol that is to be best consumed at room temperature, minus any add-ons. This means, you don’t add ice, or water, or any other mixture to this drink. Such drinks are usually meant to be sipped on slowly, to last you through most parts of your evening.
Examples of such drinks: Vodka, Whisky, Bourbon, Gin
- Mixer – is any non-alcoholic beverage that is used to mix with alcohol in order to create a cocktail.
Examples include fizzy drinks or types of juices – most commonly, cranberry or orange.
- On the rocks – Of course, you’ve heard about a whiskey… on the rocks, or a vodka on the rocks. Here’s what it means. Any drink served ‘On the rocks’ is poured out for you in a lowball glass, over a cluster of ice cubes which is from where the term gets its name.
Examples of such drinks: Scotch, Prosecco, Whiskey, Vodka
- Straight up – An alcoholic beverage that is served straight up usually lies somewhere between a ‘Neat’ and an ‘On the rocks’. Didn’t understand? This kind of a drink is usually shaken, or stirred up with ice, after which the ice is strained and the drink is served to you chilled. Suppose you go for a margarita, to this ice is added, shaken, or stirred—according to your preference—then, it is strained and served to you. You can try this with most cocktail options.
Examples of such drinks: Martini, Margarita
- Virgin – Virgin means the same as ordering a mocktail. But, here’s the thing about mocktails—it’s for teenagers. You use the word virgin. For instance, you want a Virgin Mojito; or a Virgin Bloody Mary, or a Virgin Martini. It means sans the alcohol. Get it? It’s a non teenage way of saying you want to leave the alcohol out for the night.
Examples of such drinks: All mocktails are virgin drinks—Mojitos, Martinis, Bloody Mary
- Muddled – This is when you order a drink that requires your bartender to crush the fruit or the herb so that the juice mixes well with the alcohol. You’ll notice the bartender reach for a pestle-like wooden crusher used to get the juice or essential oils out of the fruit or herb in your drink. It just helps to know this.
Examples of such drinks: A Vodka Mojito, Spritzers, Brazilian Sangria, Black and Blue Caipiroska, Caipirinha
- Dirty – This refers to an alcoholic drink, usually a cocktail in which the colour and taste is changed slightly by adding different ingredients to these. For instance, a Dirty Martini is all about adding bar olive juice so that the clarity is diluted and it tastes comparatively salty. Similarly, a Dirty Mojito is one in which you add gold rum, instead of white rum; thereby diluting the transparency of the drink.
Examples of such drinks: Dirty Martini, Dirty Shirley, Dirty Mojito, Dirty Vodka Martini
The next thing you need to know is your alcohol. “Whiskey” is a spirit typically made from fermented corn, wheat, rye, barley, and oats. It is aged for two years in oak barrels and is between 80 and 160 proof.“Bourbon” is a variation of whiskey that many people often confuse with whiskey.“Gin” is another fermented grain liquor that has added herbs and juniper berries for flavoring.“Vodka” is the most tasteless and clear of liquors, typically made from potato or grain. Because of its lack of flavor and scent, it is a good choice for infusions.“Liqueur or cordial” is a sweet spirit that is usually made from brandy, rum, or whiskey, and has different ingredients added such as seeds, nuts, spices, flowers, fruits, herbs, etc.
There’s a whole lot more, but these are just for you to start off with. Always know where to draw the line. If you’re risking somebody or your life to do it, what you’re doing cannot be tolerated. If you’re coming home drunk every night, again, you need to get your life together. Alcohol as a form of stress reliever is great, but you plan on using it as a form of dehydration, you’re walking down an unhappy road my friend. Happy drinking!
