2018 Mar 6
Love is such a beautiful thing; unless of course you have been a part of a tragic story not unlike those of Romeo and Juliet, Jack and Rose (I don’t care what James Cameron says, there was room on that damn piece of wreckage), Vijaya and Kuveni (that drama tho… oof) and the several lovers that lost their lives at the Lovers’ Leap cliff sides (yes, there is more than one) in our very own country.
Although our culture has come a long way since then, being in love and being Sri Lankan will always call for some one of a kind obstacles.
1. Cultural diversity isn’t always welcome
Now, if you are couple of two different religious or ethnic backgrounds, you might as well kiss your kella/kolla goodbye right now. Although a lot of families have now changed their outlook on the whole matter, you still do get the very religious, conservative parents who go, “I will not have my child carrying on with some fool who doesn’t follow our religion!”
While some family members threaten to not attend the weddings of those who tend to stray outside the family’s beliefs, others go around ranting to every Tom, Dick and Harry about Loku du’s horrendous choice in partners. Diversification is apparently not that great of idea when you’re a Lankan couple.
2. The Family Drama
Now this is something we all deal with anyway. No matter what your relationship status is, there will always be at least a teensy bit of family drama. After all, what is life if some Aachchi in the family is not complaining about this useless generation, eh? When it comes to relationships, family drama can move to a whole other level. It may be that Amma and Thaththa feel so strongly about “that gamé kola” certainly not being suitable for their Chooti Duwa, nor their family. Perhaps your significant other’s parents and your own don’t get along because of some trivial issue that doesn’t even matter to you. Or maybe your boyfriend’s mother disapproves of you because you can’t cook as well as her, so her Sudu Putha may end up starving to death, or so she says.
3. Unacceptable “bad habits”
Our culture tends to be on the more old-fashioned and traditional side of things, which usually doesn’t work out all that well for us girls. Don’t get me wrong; I love our culture. It is one of a kind and beautiful, but God forbid we choose to spend a Friday night with our friends, kicking back a few cold ones! It will somehow make its way to your boyfriend’s parents or even your own! Cue the lecture from every adult in your family about drinking, going out, and every other thing!
4. Getting caught red handed
Us Lankans tend to get caught red-handed doing things we’re not supposed to be doing in the worst way possible; getting caught to an Auntie or Uncle or your parents!
Allow me to paint this vivid picture: Your parents have forbidden you from getting into a relationship until you’re “old enough” (which, let’s face it, is basically never). Thus, you have to sneak around with your significant other. Since we barely have enough places to hang around, you decide to go to Racecourse, take a walk and grab some lunch. You get out of the tuk-tuk with your significant other and who happens to drive by at that exact fateful moment? Dear ol’ Auntie Seetha. Next thing you know, Amma is crying because you’re the worst child on the planet who cavorts around and can never obey your parents, Thaththa is pointing at the blurry picture that Auntie Seetha somehow miraculously managed to snap of you and your significant other, demanding to know who this person is, and there you are, taking it all in, your life flashing before your eyes. No more electronics for you and you can never leave the house again.
I rest my case.
5. Being forced into an arranged marriage
If you have ever traveled in a bus in Sri Lanka with one of those small screen TVs placed upfront, it is very likely that you would have watched one of the countless very dramatic music videos of Sinhala love songs, where the boyfriend is forced to watch in tears as his former girlfriend marries another man because her parents didn’t approve of their affair.
Sri Lankan parents do tend to get extremely passionate sometimes, especially when it involves their kids. So a slap, many tears, and a screaming match later, you may find yourself walking down the aisle with the person your parents chose for you instead. Sigh.
