If Batman Was Sri Lankan  

2016 Sep 24

by Shamila Naleer

Last Saturday (September 17) was a cardinal day to those who live and breathe the comic universe, namely DC Comics. Renowned DC Entertainment made the aforementioned date official Batman Day (yup, there is a day set aside for the Dark Knight).

Walking down memory lane, this year’s Batman Day was the third event of its kind, after first being brought to the limelight on the legend’s 75^th Anniversary. Joining strengths with thousands of comic book retailers, bookstores, schools and libraries, DC put together exciting festivities in honour of the Caped Crusader. This included free comic book giveaways, talent signings and, of course, who could ever leave out the mandatory Batman selfies. The lucky countries to go through this amazing experience and celebration were Germany, Israel, Japan, Mexico, Peru, South Korea, USA and Canada. Sadly, Sri Lanka was left out of the loop. Sigh.

On that note, here’s teeny tiny glimpse into how Batman Day prevailed.

So all the splendor and glory of Batman Day got me thinking, “Wait…. What if Batman was SRI LANKAN?”

And that brings us here.

Disclaimer; No offense or insult is meant to anyone mentioned in the article.

1. “මම බැට්මැන්”

We all know how Batman goes “I’m Batman” in that get-ready-for-a-good-beating voice. If Batman was Lankan he would indefinitely go “මම බැට්මැන්” and since I usually find Sinhala dubbed TV shows and movies hilariously comic, I would love to hear Batman go “මම බැට්මැන්”.

2. Possible actors cast to play Batman

The pool of actors and actresses Sri Lanka are, well, diverse. You get actors that can pull off almost any role and then you have those who aren’t all that great. In my opinion, if Batman was Sri Lankan, the top competitors for the character would be Roshan Ranawana, Ranjan Ramanayake, Hemal Ranasinghe and Saranga Disasekara.

Let’s put the cards on the table.

1. Roshan Ranawana’s tall, muscular physique would fit the part quite well. I don’t think he is overly dramatic when it comes to his acting, which would actually work in favor of him being Batman. Also, his looks are actually pretty decent and this would also take him far as Batman.
2. Hemal Ranasinghe; good body, good looking, not-too-shabby acting. Hm. Actually not a bad fit for the role. He was model and personally, I think he looks super classy in a suit (much like Bruce Wayne). Don’t forget, he is also a dancer. I shall explain later why this would work for him in this case.
3. Ranjan Ramanayake. Honestly, I am not a huge fan. But I don’t really watch that many Sinhala movies, so I haven’t really seen him act that much. However, what I have seen (which, for the record, was a movie named ‘One Shot One’); let’s just say I laughed. A lot. I have seen his dance moves as well, and they are oh-so-Sri Lankan.
4. Last but not least, that leaves us with Saranga Disasekara. He can dance and he can act, but I don’t think he’d be the most suitable actor for Batman. I mean, come on. It’s Batman.

3. Every Batman needs a Catwoman

Ah, Selina Kyle. This breaker of hearts and stealer of wallets is one of a kind. And just like the actors that could be potential Batmen, the actresses to play Catwoman, I think, would be Jacqueline Fernandez, Pooja Umashankar, Anarkali Arkasha and Yureni Noshika.

4. The Traffic

Seeing as most crimes in Batman occur in Gotham City itself, the Gotham City in Sri Lanka would ideally be Colombo, and no matter how fancy and upgraded Batman’s ride may be, the Bat-Mobile would never escape Colombo‘s unmoving traffic.

5. The Dance Number

Picture Batman dancing; cape swishing around, playfully chasing Catwoman while she giggles and squirms, and the countless civilians in the background moving to a baila song. Yup, this would happen if Batman was Sri Lankan and Hemal Ranasinghe would be perfect.

6. Alfred the Butler

Without Alfred Pennyworth, Batman would never have gotten as far as he did. He usually sports the classic tailcoat or suit (like in TV series, Gotham). Well, if Batman were Lankan, anticipate an Alfred wearing a sarong and a white short sleeved shirt (that’s how I picture him anyway).

7. The Joker

What is a superhero without his archenemy? One of the most fearful, maniacal villains in the DC Universe, the Joker is a character who has personified chaos and taken on everyone, from Batman to Superman. But, for the sake of this article, if the Joker was Sri Lankan, the person I see playing his character is Bandu Samarasinghe. End of story.